Showing posts with label integrity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label integrity. Show all posts

Thursday, August 27, 2020

Self-interest or selflessness in dark days.

"But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people." From Paul's second letter to Timothy as translated in the NIV.

"The darkest hour is just before the dawn" ~ Thomas Fuller

It is a truism that we are drawn as humans to focus on those things that are horrifying. Social media and the news media in general flood us with all the horrific things that are happening in the world and feed fear of "the other." Right now, at this very moment in history, the world is full of horrors. We have news of a disease that may or may not be highly infectious, we have people fearing death at the hands of government officials, we have rioting in the streets due to terrorist groups infiltrating protests causing even more fear of death, and we have hateful and angry speech being hurled back and forth mostly about who is to blame and how awful the "other side" is. That is only what is happening in the United States. In other parts of the world, there are even more horrors to be found, but the issues here in the U.S. are enough for the purposes of this writing. 

Human beings, by the very existence of sin in our hearts, are incapable of making any decisions on our own that are not tainted with self-interest. From the investment banker who thinks, "what if I just take a little bit here or there, no one will notice," to the man or woman who says to himself/herself; "I like what I see, so I'm going to take advantage of this other person and use them for my own physical pleasure," in spite of consent, outside the bond of marriage, or even outside the legal restrictions of age; to even something seemingly as innocuous as the person who says to themselves, "I see something happening over there that doesn't seem right, but I may be hurt in some way if I intervene, so I will not," all are acting in percieved self-interest. 

The believer in Jesus Christ should be different by nature of the "renewal of our minds." (see Romans 12:2) We are changed by the working of the Holy Spirit in our hearts and this, through prayer, Bible study, and meditation on God's Word; subdues the natural human inclination toward self-interest. Our focus must be centered on others rather than how we feel about a situation. It is natural to form opinions, but will the opinions and the sharing of same be beneficial to those who hear? (see Ephesians 4:29). 

Another application is to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger (See James 1:19). Part of wisdom and maturity in Christ is knowing when to listen, especially when to listen to the still small voice of the Holy Spirit. When we, as Christ followers, rush to judgement and speak the first thing that comes to mind, we fall into a dangerous trap. The world is watching. They know what we claim to be, and when they see us act exactly like them (and sometimes worse), we blend with the darkness and they see no difference. 

"Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16 NASB) A light shines in the darkness, and our light is the light of Christ. We do not have it of our own selves, it comes from God through the Holy Spirit, and when we let that light shine we share the Spirit of God with others. Only the Light of God can overcome the darkness of this world. "The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness can never extinguish it." (John 1:5 NLT)

When we live as light, we show love to our neighbors. We know who our neighbor is, that particular illustration has been reiterated so many times that any American Christian who has not heard of the good Samaritan, has been hiding in a hole somewhere with no human contact. The instruction to love our neighbors is antithetical to self-interest. The Apostle Paul even goes so far as to say we should consider others as better than ourselves. 

Then there is the Apostle James, who tells us that the tongue (a metaphor for our speech, i.e. what we say), is like the rudder of a ship, which can either keep it on course, or scuttle it. 

We all have feelings, and there is a reason the Apostle Paul said, "be angry but do not sin." Our feelings need to be put under the submission of the Holy Spirit. We cannot let them control how we react or interact with others, but rather we should excercise compassion in all our interactions. Compassion, agape love if you will, is more than just a feeling; it is a pattern of behavior. 

So before we speak or post the tweet or facebook comment that will "show the other guy," we need to stop, take a breath, and make sure that it meets the following criteria:

1. Is is true? If yes, go to #2. If no, stop and do not post or say it. If uncertain, stop and do not post or say it. 

2. Is it compassionate or is it loving? If you are certain it is, go to #3. If the answer is no, or you are not sure, go to prayer and seek counsel from scripture or someone wise in the faith.

3. Is it beneficial? If I say what I am thinking, will it lead people closer to Christ or might it push them away? 

I hope this is helpful to those who read it. If you are touched by what God has given me, please share it. Let us encourage each other toward the Light. 



Friday, March 14, 2014

Forever fruits...

Proverbs 22:6
"Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

The following is an open letter to my son:

Y'know, when you invest your time and love in another person , and you finally start to see your efforts bearing fruit, that is an amazing feeling.

Nine and a half years ago, you came into our lives. Your mother and I weren't sure what to expect when a bespectacled seven-year-old came into our lives, walked into our humble little trailer and exclaimed "sweet! I have my own room!"

The first time you called me Daddy, I knew I was hopelessly lost.

Your life with us has been at times a battle, at times, a heartbreak, and at other times, absolute bliss. There have been times we've been so worried for you, we couldn't sleep.

Now, getting close to ten years later, you've grown into a handsome young man. Not only that, you've grown in other ways that touch my heart. Fewer are the moments of frustration,  and greater are the moments when I see a glimpse of the great man you are becoming.  Over the last two months, and even moreso, over the last three weeks, I have seen you exercise a maturity and a tender heart that make me realize, I was right to stay strong through the hard times.

I am proud to call you son, and look forward to seeing you grow fully into a man of strength and integrity.

Now I'm going to go have a little cry...a happy one.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Sometimes you just have to walk away.

“You can please some of the people some of the time all of the people some of the time some of the people all of the time but you can never please all of the people all of the time.”

- Abraham Lincoln 

Yeah, it's not a scripture passage, but don't worry, that's coming. In fact, in 1 Corinthians 8, the Apostle Paul talks about not offending others with our actions. Specifically, he writes about eating meat sacrificed to idols. 

Paul states that we should be aware so we don't cause a younger brother or sister in faith to stumble. So we do our best, and sometimes, even when we see another person making an error and try to bail them out, it turns on us anyway. It recently happened to me when I confronted someone about something they had posted on social media. One thing led to another and it became obvious that not only was the original poster not going to be reasonable, but one of his family members joined the fray, and I had to apply another scripture. In fact, it is one of my favorite, on the surface most confusing, scripture passages.  

Proverbs 26:4,5 (NLT)

4 Don’t answer the foolish arguments of fools,
   or you will become as foolish as they are.

5 Be sure to answer the foolish arguments of fools,
    or they will become wise in their own estimation.

My understanding of these verses is this: Don't argue with someone who isn't willing to listen because you're not going to win and you'll just be frustrated in the long run. Correct someone when they're saying something silly, because if you don't they'll just keep on doing it. Simply put, state your piece, and if the other person isn't willing to roll with it, walk away. 

Proverbs 10:8 (NLT)   

The wise are glad to be instructed,
    but babbling fools fall flat on their faces.

All we can do is try to point the other person in the right direction and pray that they go the right way. Beyond that, they're responsible to God for their own actions. 

So, I walked away. I'll pray for the kid and his family, but it will do me no good to continue to bang my head against the wall, and it won't do either the kid, or his family member any good because they're convinced of their self-righteousness. 

It all comes back to balance. 

Proverbs 10:9 (NLT) 

People with integrity walk safely, but those who follow crooked paths will slip and fall.